Runaway

Maybe you're right..

I've been neglecting us. I've been away. I've disappeared. I've done everything that makes us upset.

But all I asked was time. understanding. strength.

Time.
My crazy time of my life is here.. For several years, from schools to another school, it's always the same with me. My exams take the centre stage of my life..

Understanding.
With exams taking so much time. My preparations for it. How physically and brain drained I always feel after a whole day spent studying. How I just wanna sit, have dinner, small lil chats and cuddle to remind me that I have something to look forward after the hell week is over.

Strength.
I dont have the strength to pull through without you. I need someone to be there, kiss my forehead and remind me that it's ok to fail. To remind me that I am not letting anyone down.


It's been tough for me, as it is for you. But I appreciate it all that you did. How you would meet even for a short while to have dinner with me. To meet me eventhough you're hanging out with your friends. To try cheering me up. And even, travelling down to just pass me a chinese tea and panadol. I thank you for all that...
For your presence, for being there.

I'm sorry I can't meet all those expectations anymore. Maybe, indeed, I've retract.. I've been boring, I've not been random, I always say the wrong things, I always upset you. I'm sorry I don't make you happy anymore. But first, I just want to say if you think there is another in my life, none. No one. Blame it all on me. Blame it all on school. Blame it on me trying to vie for the top levels.

But let's do so... like what you suggested.

So, if you miss me and you think my presence would makes a difference even for a short while, then call me. For I miss you, the one who text me in the morning. the one who calls me in the night and asked how my day went. the one who holds my hand when we crossed the road. the one who hugs me when we parted. the one who kissed my forehead and genuinely smile seeing me.

For I assure you it was never what I wanted but if you think it's the best, then let's do it. I will be waiting.